Lolita Fashion and Sustainability

One of my new years resolutions is to buy clothing more sustainably where I can, I’m aiming for better not perfect. It got me thinking about how I interact with Lolita fashion and where I think that Lolita engenders itself to being sustainable and where it doesn’t. The first point for lolita being more sustainable is that it is not at all a fast fashion, and individuals typically treasure the items they collect. Unfortunately also due to this Lolita Fashion is inherently a little materialistic and finding out where japanese companies produced their items can be next to impossible to figure out. With all of this in mind I’ve made an actionable plan to help increase my ability to be more sustainable while enjoying the fashion I love

1.) Mend and Alter my Clothes

This is also great for saving money! As you aren’t going to be buying a new blouse every time it has a small stain. The egl livejournal memories although they aren’t very active anymore are still a great resource for lolita specific repairs. Learning how to treat specific stains, sew and tailor will be great life skills in general, help keep things from becoming throwaway items and save you money! It’s really a win- win. Learning how to alter your clothes can also allow you to make them more fashionable! I have a large bust, so my blouses usually create the dreaded boob loaf.

Here’s my most recent Project
The replacement lace
Back Panels I added to make it fit

2.) Buying from Independent Designers!

For me personally buying from independent designers helps alleviate a lot of the worry I have even buying from big brand houses. In most causes the person or small group you’re buying from are the people who made it! I’m looking forward to some planned purchases I have on Etsy from independent designers I’ll be reviewing on here. However, I have heard word that Glitter Tale and Lady Sloth are amazing independent brands. In fact Lady Sloth actually was the creator of one of my dream dresses! Spooky Macarons! Another benefit to buying from independent designers is that many of them nowadays have plus size or custom size options

3.) Buy Secondhand

I already do this quite frequently but buying secondhand is a surefire way to make sure that your money is going into the pocket of another lolita and you know that it’s getting it’s full use. I personally use Lacemarket due to it’s ease and policies however if you’re braver than me you could give ordering from Closet Child a go.

4.) Appreciate the Pieces I Already Own

I finally organized my closet last week and I realized. I own far more pieces than I give myself credit for. It can be really easy to be swept up in all of the new releases but take a moment to shop your own closet, try new ways of coording things before springing for new releases. Also almost everything pops back up on the secondhand market and by then you’ll know if you truly want it or not. This is one of the best ways to be more sustainable is to consume less. Of course with Lolita this is a challenge since there are many layers and pieces involved.I think focusing on your workhorse pieces, like blouses, socks, and shoes, can truly make your closet more versatile.

A Love Letter to Tea

Tea is a very special drink to me. For me it represents comfort and a safe place. It has for a long time and admittedly I have a pretty intense emotional connection to tea starting with chamomile tea parties with feather boas at my grandma’s house underneath a light up painting of a unicorn. (If my parents had heard of Lolita it would not at all be a surprise I dress the way I do to them) This year whenever things got hard, one of my roommates would always offer me tea. I appreciated it and it honestly has helped me develop one of my healthier coping mechanisms that I have been using. Tea, I feel, has a special place in many Lolitas hearts. It is one of the most elegant of drinks and it connects people all over the world. There are ceremonies for tea in both the east and the west, Tea can be as formal as an Afternoon Tea or full Tea Ceremony or just you and a good book. I also find that tea helps me ground myself. It’s a healthier alternative to many other options of drink. There are also endless flavors of tea, with almost anything you can imagine also being a tea flavor.

Tea has connected me not just to my lolita friends but to my roommates as well, for the years we have lived together it has been common for us to have a well stocked tea cupboard and an electric kettle, well, until we finally wore it out from all of the tea we drank! I also love the aesthetics of tea and how it’s such a gentle thing, it reminds me of kindness, caring and warmth. In short, I love tea.

5 Tips for Busty Lolitas

I have a 34H cup chest currently so it makes it pretty difficult to find dresses and blouses in my size and have them flatter me. So if you are also in this boat, here’s some advice!

I am a bit like Alice, I give myself very good advice but I very seldom follow it. So if there is a dress you love, and you like how it looks, rock it! This is just what I find works best when I feel like putting in the extra effort.

1.) Bodices are your friend

I find the extra space allowed by the more 3 dimensional nature of the bodice block has created my most flattering and comfortable dresses. Empire waists often cut my bust off at the bottom and creates a bit of a bizzare effect.

2.) A-Line silhouettes are the most flattering

This is an old standby that I found when searching for tips for busty lolitas when I was first starting out and it is definitely true if you’re trying to do as little compensating elsewhere. However, you shouldn’t limit yourself to only half of the silhouette! There are ways to be the frilly cupcake of your dreams

3.) For Bell Shaped silhouettes drop waists and thick waist bands are your friend

This is what I have found helps, having that break between the poof and your bust creates a better silhouette and helps accentuate your waist more. I’m a strong believer that you can wear whatever shapes or colors you want, you may just need to modify it if you desire to fit into the mainstream aesthetic.

4.) Buy clothes that will fit your measurements (Actually fits, not just fits by the grace of those above)

This is the part where I say I very seldom follow my own advice. This one is probably the hardest because it may limit your wardrobe and what you can buy realistically. However, you will feel so much better in clothes that fit and not having breathing make a button go flying. (I have actually had this experience)

5.) High Neck Blouses are pretty great

I struggle to have my normal necked ops not turn into accidental ero lolita coords due to the copious amounts of cleavage that will occur whether I want it to or not. Blouses that can button all the way to the neck and can be layered even under OPs will help extend your wardrobe greatly.

7 Unique Lolita Meetup Venues

1.) An arcade

An issue my comm often has is having everyone be able to afford the meetups we go to and an arcade is an awesome way to solve this. If someone wants to spend 5$ or 20$ or none at all, it doesn’t matter, and you can get some unique pics in places with neon lights!

2.) Bar/Club

This only applies to the 21+ crowd, but still could be fun in some of your more inexpensive pieces of your wardrobe and could be a fun experience

3.) Escape Room Meetup

Join the recent escape room craze and have a group try to escape. For added fun theme your coords around the room.

4.) Go to a Sporting Event!

Hockey, Baseball, Basketball, Soccer, Figure Skating, whatever! Go and give it a try you may discover a new thing you like! The energy at games are fun, and watching it can be exciting. It also may be easier for members of your comm where walking can limit their ability to attend

5.) Go to a Comedy Show!

They do say that laughter is the best medicine! Just make sure the performer you’re seeing is appropriate for everyone in your party

6.) Volunteer Somewhere!

Make sure that you’re volunteering in a place where your outfits would be appropriate and wouldn’t get ruined. Like volunteering in a group at a soup kitchen, or at a senior center, where your comm in a group might brighten a few people’s days and make a difference

7.) Go to a Concert!

Pick an artist and enjoy the show! Their could be lots of local bands playing or you can make it a grand affair!

Lifestyle Lolita Ideas for College Students

1.) Thrift a teapot and tea set

2.) Make a DIY Princess canopy for your dorm room

3.) Buy extra princessy bedding, whatever that means to you

4.) Get really cute stationary and notebooks so you can feel aesthetic even while studying

5.) Have a daily tea time break for yourself even if you aren’t able to pull of the whole thing. Just sit for 5 minutes when you get home and enjoy a nice warm cup of tea

6.) Thrift Vintage Pajamas

7.) Thrift Vintage House dresses for days you want to be comfortable but still aesthetic

8.) Experiment with hairstyles for when you have to go to your part time job, try bow clips in already work appropriate hairstyles

9.) Create a Lolita Blog, Insta, or a simple photo album for yourself

10.) Read books from your schools library on whatever interests you, the older looking the cover the better! (Also for classic lolitas out there, libraries make great photo backgrounds near the collections of old books)

11.) If you have elective requirements try to take classes you think a victorian lady or a princess would have taken, for example next semester I’m taking a drawing course, french and am getting flute lessons from a friend

12.) Have a go to comfy outfit that doesn’t make you feel frumpy, college is hard and wearing lolita every single day isn’t realistic no matter how much you love it but it’s important to be able to be comfortable every once in awhile without taking a hit to how you feel

13.) Get colorful/fun string lights for your dorm room

14.) Invest in some cute matching hangers

15.) Get a cheap outfit mirror and decorate it with fake flowers for pretty outfit shots

16.) Listen to classical/cute/spooky music when you study, (also I know its pretty stereotypical but tea out of a fancy tea cup while studying is a ten out of ten)

17.) Follow along with intro to ballet youtube videos (just please don’t try pointe at home)

18.) Practice piano in the practice rooms in the music department

19.) Sketch things daily

20.) Go to free art events in your area or even on campus, take advantage of concerts, museums, and art galleries

Happy Winter International Lolita Day 2019!

So yesterday was international lolita day! Unfortunately due to finals and money things I stayed home and studied. But it doesn’t mean I didn’t dress up!

I even had a little tea party with myself studying and tried out livestreaming on youtube for the first time. I don’t think I’ve mentioned it on my blog yet; I have a youtube channel! I can be found at Liliana Rowena and post a lot more than just lolita fashion on that channel. But I do have Lolita Fashion videos as well and some of the content here turned into video form. Yesterday I did experience some feelings of having missed out seeing all of the lovely members of my comm chatting about logistics and seeing their posts but seeing their posts brought me some joy whenever I saw them on my study breaks.

Here’s some tea my roommate made me when I had a spell of feeling down

I also had some fun hanging with friends, later on that day. One of my close friends is graduating early so all of us as roommates have been making an effort to hang out with her more. Winding down this semester feels so weird since I’ll be in my final semester of undergrad. I plan on going to graduate school but not right away.

The best dress I own!

Here’s what my coord for yesterday looked like! Since I didn’t really leave the house I didn’t wear shoes so I felt like the protagonist of a Gothic novel, wandering about a grand drafty castle about to discover a mystery late at night. For now, that will be all I have to say since I just wanted to post a quick little update on yesterday and look forward to more posts in the future!

10 Signs you May be a Disaster Lolita

I feel like the ethereal majesty of lolita fashion is an inspiration to us all. The girls we see on closet of frills with all of their metals matched, coords perfectly planned, and their praises being sung. I am an avid lover of Lolita and have been for years, but I still don’t seem to have this effortless grace all of these other girls do. In fact, I’m still building much of my wardrobe, and struggle to the tow the line between fun and costume-y. I don’t believe that these things stop us from being lolitas though! Especially since I consider myself to be a lifestyler, albeit more of a princess in training. So here’s a list, a loving ode to myself and to anyone else, who could be considered chaotic floof.

1.) You have a lot of mismatching in your aesthetic not because it’s your style but because you couldn’t find the other sock

2.) Aprons at restaurant meets are a must for you because if not, food is getting on your one nice piece no matter how hard you try for it not to

3.) You buy your wardrobe like a magpie selecting a collection of shiny things of of lacemarket with the advanced price tool on typically set to 100$ or less with no regard to if it matches anything you own.

4.) You have been seen pouring concerning things into your fancy tea cups. Like that time I poured Monster into my porcelain.

5.) You have about 3 or more different aesthetics going on in your wardrobe yet none feel like you have quite enough

6.) You straight up forget that accessories are a thing you need to buy so before meets you scramble through your closet pulling anything that could remotely match your coord, so at least there’s something on your head, darn it!

7.) You’ve been collecting Lolita for 3 years or more but still are somehow missing quite a few wardrobe basics. (Oh boy I need some blouses)

8.) You have a very cute aesthetic to your room, yet it’s almost never clean enough to put pictures of it online

9.) Putting makeup on takes way longer than it needs to, because it takes 15 min to find the single eyeliner you own

10.) You get home from meets and throw your coord on the floor like everyone else, but somehow forget about it until a week later

I hope you all enjoyed my list! These are honestly things that I mostly do that I find are hilariously mismatched to the aesthetic, and I hope you can relate to one or two.

If you can relate to all, then the chaotic floof brigade unite!

25 Gothic Lolita Gift Ideas

This was inspired by Princess Peachie’s video on Sweet Lolita Gift Ideas, I may not have gotten to the impressive number she did, but I wanted to acknowledge the inspiration

1.) Black lace trim

2.) Porcelain Doll

3.) Owl Pellet Kit

4.) Gothic Color/Themed Tea Set

5.) Grimm Fairy Tales

6.) Gothic Literature

7.) Girly Black Accessories

8.) Herbs to grow

9.) Crystals

10.) (Ask first!) Bones/Taxidermy

11.) Black Food Coloring/Fun gothic baking molds

12.) Creepy Cute Stickers

13.) Jewelry with mortuary themes, bats, alchemical, or medical themes, your lolita can have her own preferences so pay attention

14.) Beautiful Mortuary Photography Books (Ask first)

15.) Books by Caitlin Doughty (Ask)

16.) Elegant Dark Stationary

17.) Cemetery Photography

18.) Evanescence Album

19.) Tim Burton’s Corpse Bride

20.) Black lace tights, black or burgundy or gray tights

21.) Drawing Materials

22.) Black Bath Bomb

23.) Dark Makeup Brushes,

24.) Black nail polish

25.) Black Lipstick, a good one

10 Winter Meetup Ideas

The snow has fallen and although it is still only november I’m still very much feeling the winter spirit! Here’s some Winter Meetup Ideas! They’ll be a range of prices and accessibility in this list. Also, quite a few of these things my comm has done!

1.) Go Ice Skating!

it’s a classic winter activity and is perfect to get lovely wintery pictures, and learning something new with friends is always fun

2.) Cozy Movie Day

Have a more casual clothes meet! Have some coco and settle in with a lolita themed movie! Or a holiday wintery one!

3.) Snow Sculpture Building Contest

If the people in your comm have the snow gear, this could be a ton of fun! Make it as casual or as serious as you want. Also, be sure to have some hot cocoa and a good place to warm up

4.) Yarn Snowball Fight!

Don’t live where there is snow/you don’t have the gear. Buy a big ball of white yarn, make diy snowballs and have at! I personally love doing this with my siblings and see it possibly being a great deal of fun.

5.) Knitting/Crocheting Party

Cozy knits always remind me of winter and it’s always good to learn new skills. Get your friends together with some supplies, listen to some music and chat while people make cozy crafts! Simple scarves are a great choice for beginners.

6.) Holiday Baking Party

Make cute cookies, gingerbread houses or whatever else you would like! With the cold weather the heat of the oven won’t be so overbearing to all of those petticoats! It will also help get you in the holiday mood

7.) Cafe Hopping

Does your area have lots of lovely little cafes? Spend an afternoon giving a few a try! You could also do just one but it is really fun to go from cafe to cafe if you have the money and time

8.) Snowflake Party!

Make lots of lovely paper snowflakes and decorate a friends place or your own!

9.) Take a Photo Op trip to the Mall!

You know all of those lovely Christmas trees in the mall? They’re perfect for creating a fun photo op for taking fun holiday coord shops! Plus there’s lots of fun things to do in the mall

10.) Take a Photography Walk/Photo Scavenger Hunt

Just like with the mall, grab your winter prints and head outside and pretend you’re all models! Get as many cute shots as you can, go for group shots, try to find things that match the prints on your dress or compliment what you’re wearing

How I Discovered Lolita Fashion

Well, I’ve started a few Lolita blogs that never really took off, I have a hard time figuring out what to write and doing it consistently so I’ve decided this time that I’ll start from the beginning. My love affair with Lolita Fashion began when I first started looking for a prom dress, I remember being on the computer in the family living room late at night after my family had long gone to bed. I was looking through so many dresses that I didn’t like and so many with bizarre cut outs and silhouettes that I didn’t love, and then I laid my eyes upon it. A single simple black dress on ebay, it had an a-line shape with a ruffle on the hem, puffed sleeves a sweetheart neckline and a bow on the waistline. It was cheap and satiny and I have to admit I absolutely loved it! The style was so simple and elegant and touched some feeling within me that clothing had never elicited from me before. For me, Lolita Fashion all of a sudden transformed into a way I could form an identity for myself. Yes, the clothes were beautiful but for me it was never purely about clothes even in the beginning. When I looked at those clothes I saw a version of myself I could love. I saw the beautiful princess that I could transform into. An elegant lady who was feminine, kind, competent, and a leader. I saw in these clothes everything I wanted to be.

When I was younger, I always felt torn in my identity. I grew up in a split family, and in some ways it made my life difficult. In others it’s been fantastic, I mean I have 4 parents and all of the pros and cons that go with that. I got lots of extra love and lots of conflicting expectations, and as I began to grow into a young lady these expectations were put into sharp relief with one another, especially in the examples of what womanhood should be. For one mother it was putting me in makeup far outstripping my age and making me look far too sexual for a 14 year old in my opinion, in the other it was an intense revulsion to makeup or anything too feminine and it led me to a lot of confusion. I didn’t truly identify with the more masculine presenting femininity which is very common today. I respected it and loved that many women in my family found self love within that but for me I couldn’t. I also didn’t identify with the hypersexualized feminity that was presented to me at my other home, so when I looked at lolita fashion it almost felt like a salvation, an answer to the things I had been questioning and longing for for such a long time. Finally, I thought to myself. I can feel like a woman and have no shame feeling that.

I’m grateful for my discovery of lolita fashion for many reasons. In many ways I believe it taught me how to be a woman. I learned to put makeup on that didn’t look like a clown had done it from the lovely ladies I learned from and looked up to. I finally learned how to match colors in an outfit. (As a child I believed neon green and purple went together because I wanted to look like a Decepticon.) I also learned the things I did and didn’t want to be. In Lolita I idolize the fairy tale type of Princess, the type that is kind, beautiful, and brave and I strive to be that. It’s an inspiration I take to heart. Fashion wise, the road has been a bit bumpy and I’m still learning, as I have been a student this whole time some of my resources have been limited. So, I wasn’t nearly as pic happy then but I’ll show you some of my first coords I have pics of.

So my very first coord wasn’t too bad! I was super proud to show off my first piece of lolita clothing, a FanPlusFriend Tardis skirt. As I am a huge fan of Doctor Who and it seemed a good way to introduce the clothes to my family

I was so proud of that tiny top hat I made! It’s not the best quality because I made it out of cardboard and scrap velvet. However, because of that hat, I am still a huge fan of those tiny hats and you all can fight me on it. 😛 I suppose they hold such a huge place in my heart because that hat was made the night I found out that my grandmothers cancer was untreatable and going on livejournal and finding that old tutorial and busily working on it till the wee hours of the morning was all I could do to keep from breaking down.

This picture was just not lolita at all! I only owned one outfit and this was my best attempt at a second outfit. Although this pic isn’t the most flattering of me, this outfit actually helped me get the majority of my wardrobe! A lovely girl in my comm was selling a large chunk of her wardrobe and she custom selected a lot of my current wardrobe from the colors I used! This is now the pallette of my gothic wardrobe!

Ever since I started Lolita it has been close to my heart, it may fade a bit at times, however when times get tough it is always something I can lean on and look to to get through it. In fact I have been looking to it recently as my mental health has been suffering a bit. That aspiration to transform into the person I know I can be. Thank you all for reading the first post on this blog and I hope you’ll come back to read more

Have a beautiful day

Liliana Rowena

#lolitafashion #lifestylelolita

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